Colorado Technical University

Could you please edit my letter?

December 3, 2008 Detroit Windsor Tunnel LLC 100 East Jefferson Detroit, Michigan 48226 Dear Mr, Neal Belitsky Please consider my application for the position of Customs Officer that is now on advertisement with the Canada border services. The position is an outstanding match with my education and career interests. With Police Foundation program at Trios College in Windsor Ontario, I have training on Microsoft Office Application, Politics and the Law, The Canadian Justice System, Traffic Management, Social Sciences, Community Policing, interpersonal Communication and police practice and theory. In addition, with Customs Administration and brokerage logistics courses at St. Clair College in Windsor Ontario, I have training on roles and responsibilities of Canadian Border Services including a vast of information on importing, exporting, publications and forms and safety and security and much more. In addition, I am able to communicate in four different languages, which are English, Persian, Turkish and Azeri. This is an advantage for me to communicate to individuals who speak these languages at the border if needed. I have volunteering experiences in Windsor Fire & Rescue Services, Windsor Hotel Dieu Hospital and Windsor police. I have worked as an office secretary and have experience dealing with the public. Please consider my request for an interview to discuss my qualifications further. I will be in touch in the near future to see if a meeting can be arranged. If you would like to reach me before then please contact me at 519-991-5506. I would appreciate your consideration. I look forward meeting and talking with you. Yours truly,

Public Comments

1. This sounds really good, and I didn't see any writing errors in it. I think they'll be impressed. Good luck. I hope you get what you're looking for, and are happy with it.
2. In addition, I am able to communicate in four different languages, which are English, Persian, Turkish and Azeri. this should read: In addition, I am able to communicate in four different languages: English, Persian, Turkish and Azeri. it's much more concise and syntactically professional.
3. (i am changing the lines given below) including a vast information on import, export, publications and forms, safety and security and much more. I have got enormous experiences in Windsor Fire & Rescue Services, Windsor Hotel Dieu Hospital and Windsor police. I have worked as an office secretary and skifull deal with people. In addition, I can communicate in four different languages: English, Persian, Turkish and Azeri, which cuould be helpuf in dealing with foreigners. Please consider my request for thhe interview to discuss my qualifications further. You can contact me on 519-991-5506. I would appreciate your consideration. Thanking you Yours truly (according to the new patterns of formal letter, they are in open punctuation, menas no punctuation. So, i'd reccomend you not to apply comma after complementary close .i.e, Your truly )